Life Can’t Be That Bad

This should probably be saved for IWSG, but I’m not feeling confident about writing. ☹

At all.

Let me start again.

I’m not feeling confident about writing for a living. I want to (really, really), but I’m just not confident that it’s ever going to happen. Like, ever. Hopefully, this is the tiny pessimist in me screaming to be heard, and she’ll just shut up. Maybe she won’t. She’s been singing this bull for years and sometimes I get sucked in. Grr.

I’m just overwhelmed. Not by the writing part, but the everything-else part. Some people can write AND hold down a fulltime job (with overtime) AND be happy in their relationships/social lives AND only sleep three hours but that’s not me. I need eight hours.

I’m fine, really. Just feeling a little sad, and maybe disappointed. I’m sure this will pass until the pessimist returns again in five or six months, but by then, I should have a decent wine collection going, so I’ll deal with it discreetly.

There’re a lot of positive/encouraging things I post on FB, and yes, it’s mainly for all of you, because I know you’re all hurting in your own private ways. But I also post them for me as a reminder to breathe, and that it’s going to be okay. So, maybe I won’t write for a living, and maybe I’m not supposed to. Maybe there’s something else way cooler  that I’m supposed to do? *shrugs*

I honestly have no idea.

But it’ll be okay.  I have a wine collection growing. Life can’t be that bad. 😊

It’s a Toss Up For Me IWSG

First and foremost: Happy birthday, Courtney! 😊

You are an AWESOME older sister, and before anything else, today is YOUR day. Happy, happy, HAPPIEST of birthdays, I love you, and I’m sorry I pushed your face into the couch all those times we fought. You did kind of ask for it though.

Second and secondmost: Batman went under the knife last Friday. Sadly no, not to something cool like ninjas or pirates or psychotic rogue Canadians. He had a little outpatient surgery to remove a benign lump that was causing some breathing troubles. Not cool when you want to like, live and breathe normally. But he’s out and about and *technically* has lost more weight for the wedding than I have. I need to step my game up.

Third and thirdmost: Happy IWSG day 😊

I’ve done a lot of writing (and have some writing updates!) but I’m not ready to get into anything yet, so we’ll focus on the optional monthly question:

Whose perspective do you like to write from best, the hero (protagonist) or the villain (antagonist)? And why?

Huh.

Actually kind of tough.

I love my protagonists because they’re funny and cool and smart, so naturally I enjoy writing them…but there is something amazing about writing terribly awful characters. 😊 I guess it’s fun because you get to peek into another kind of mindset, and whereas you strive to do good in reality (I hope?) you can be as twisted and fucked up as you want through the character. So…there is a bit an allure to it.

I don’t know. This one is a toss up for me. I’ll say both.

What about you?

Any birthdays coming up? Or surgery? Who do/would you think you’d prefer to write: hero or villain?

Insecure Writer’s Support Group (IWSG) is a monthly blog hop for writers at all levels to share their fears and insecurities in a safe and encouraging place. Please drop by and say hi to Alex Cavanaugh who started this nifty concept in bringing us all together.

This Needs to be the Majority Folks

My heart hurts ☹

So many of the people I love have been going through some EPIC shit struggles right now. One right after the other right after the other, and I want to make it all go away. For all of them. But the sucky thing about being a human and not a demi-God is the inability to make loneliness, sickness, and constant fear go away. No matter how much you want it to.

(Demi-Gods, you’ve won this round!)

I don’t mean for this to be a sad post; I’m sorry. It’s just that a friend hit me with some news recently, and I didn’t expect it. I was focused on other friends’ troubles and this one landed on top of it and wow.

Just…

Wow.

So many people I love are in pain. ☹

Are you feeling this too? Is there a moon shifting somewhere? Mercury colliding with Mitsubishi or something? Like WHAT is happening? (and please don’t tell me this is the end of the world. No, it isn’t. Shut up.) I hope whatever’s going on in the universe corrects itself because it’d be nice to hear someone say that something amazing happened to them. (And yes, a few of you have, but I want more of you to. Like, this needs to be the majority, folks).

So, why don’t we make a list then, huh? Tell me one AMAZING thing that’s happened to you recently. Big or small, I don’t care. Get the closest spot in the parking lot? NICE. Find twenty dollars in your back pocket? AWESOME. Someone give up their seat for you? HOLY FREAKING SHIT. Tell me. I want to know. I want to know it all. Life sucks sometimes so please help remind me why it doesn’t.

I’ll go first:

I purchased something small but meaningful for my wedding and I absolutely LOVE IT. Can’t tell ya what it is; you’ll have to wait for the pictures…some six hundred days from now (but who’s counting?). But yeah, it made me happy. Now you go. What’s something amazing that’s happened recently?

Also, because, how is he not amazing?

I’m Being a Good Writer

Batman took me to my first Bridal Expo.

I paid and there was free food and a bar so…yeah. Plus, he’s a gamer, so I spun it like we were doing recon. Because we were. Because this entire year is recon for next year so when the time comes to make the hard/expensive decisions, we know what we’re doing. 😊 (realistically: we know slightly more than nothing).

I’m a planner. You? I have to look at things months in advance. Interesting since I’m a panster when it comes to writing, but I usually spin my wheels thinking when I’m not at my keyboard. So…sort of off-duty planning, I guess. (We’ll call that backstage recon writing).

I’ve been working on Return to Dellapalania which has been coming along at a slug’s speed, but I’m constantly distracted with Pintrest and the Knot and Wedding Wire and JUST KNOWING there’s so much stuff I could be looking at. I’m excited, guys—what can I say? But I’ve decided to limit wedding-stuff to thirty minutes to an hour AFTER I’ve committed myself to around an hour of writing.

See? I’m being a good writer 😊

But what I really need to do is work on RTD, so I’m going to do that. Need to give the Patrons over at ol’ Patreon something to read on Friday. That’s right. I have little snippets from my first draft that I post to Patreon so you can sneak a peek at what first drafts look like (and how much they suck).

Hope you’re having a great week!

Happy hump day!

It’s This Little Town

I went to Savannah 😊

It’s this little town in Georgia. Heard of it?

If you haven’t gone, I *highly* recommend going. I’ve been three times now, and have had a blast each trip! Also, I’ve managed to do something new. Yeah, it’s one of those places. Every visit there’s a new region or street or shop to explore. The one thing I have done each trip is the ghost tour…because I mean, come on. Ghost tours! The first one I was drunk (so it doesn’t count.) The second one, Batman and I went on, and we bonded with our guide who was also way into the Walking Dead. This last time was super spooky, except our guide was like a stranger version of Andy Dick. Think about that for a second.

One of the highlights of the trip (besides spending it with two awesome ladies!) was the American Prohibition Museum. Educational with a lot of large installations and wax figures. There was also a Speak Easy inside! How cool is that?

I also did my first Escape Room. We were trapped in Alcatraz and trying to escape, but we had to find our file in the Warden’s office. I was useless. I contributed absolutely nothing other than holding the flashlight, so the other, smarter people could figure out the clues. Yes, we won (with 10 minutes to spare!) but I know I did nothing besides directing light, and I’m fine with that.

I will *totally* be doing another escape game.

Have you been to Savannah? If so, what did you like about it? If not, do you want to go?

I Need Some Purchased Hours IWSG

Besides writing, what other creative outlets do you have?

(I figured I’d jump right into the IWSG question; no introduction. I’m dangerous like that😉)

Let’s see, besides writing, I have a ton of creative outlets—I just don’t utilize most of them. There is a very dusty keyboard to my left that I wish I would play more of, but any available free time goes to this keyboard (see what I did there?) I also love to sketch sarcastic cartoon comics that I day-dream will be the next Garfield (but like, a thousand times different. And darker. Way darker.) If we could buy time, I’d never have money for anything because I’d spend it all on more hours. Forget the wedding. Batman and I will make due at the courthouse—with a kickass honeymoon, let’s not get crazy here—but everything else would go to the “purchased hours” I could actually be productive in.

Ah, society. I could serve you much better. But you keep making me pay for shit.

What about you? Do you dabble in more than one artistic field? Or when you’re fed up with your favorite medium, what do you switch to?

Insecure Writer’s Support Group (IWSG) is a monthly blog hop for writers at all levels to share their fears and insecurities in a safe and encouraging place. Please drop by and say hi to Alex Cavanaugh who started this nifty concept in bringing us all together.