Character Name Poll / Pattern of My Brain

First, thank you to everyone who called out their favorite bitch. You all are rockstars, and one of these amazing names will actually be a character in A Royal Pairing in Perish! Only a handful of people might read it (though the goal is a bit more…) but even so, a story is a story, and once handed to the world, it becomes real—even for one person. And this office brown-nosing butt-munch will live inside that person’s head, which means you helped craft life. Kinda cool.

And, since I used my “Patricia” placeholder up until the very end, I forfeit my right to choose the name I like the most. This one will be decided by you guys, in this poll, that I’ve so masterfully crafted with WordPress’s help. The choices:

Vote for your favorite, and I’ll reveal the results next week. I already know what I’m leaning toward, but again, this one’s going to be chosen by you! So, let’s see who makes it in the book.

Second, I’m finally having my dental surgery.

*throws confetti*

Wait—what? Dental surgery.

*stops throwing confetti*

*walks over confetti to get boxed wine*

*drinks and sobs*

This is the pattern of my brain every time I think about it. Because yes, I am FOR SURE excited to finally fix this horrible issue which causes me immense amount of pain. So much that some days I wake up not sure I’ll be able to chew, while other mornings, I’m convinced my teeth have all shifted over the night because the big-bad-wisdom tooth has bullied them over. Still, as suuuuuper excited as I am to finally be done with this ridiculous pain, I am legit terrified.

Because…like…it’s surgery. In my mouth. They’re pulling teeth and I’ll have stitches and will need to drink my meals for a weak and it’s like…a thing. A major, scary thing that I really don’t want to do. But, I’ve been doing the opposite—living in pain and avoidance—for far too long, and it’s just not working for me anymore. So, I need to be brave. At least, I have to make sure Batman drives me to the appointment on Friday, because once I’m there, I can’t back out. And if I drive myself, who knows? I might end up at a Starbucks drive-through instead.

What about you? Have you had your wisdom teeth removed? Do you hate going to the dentist? And did you vote on your favorite Karen name above?

I’m dying to know on all accounts.

~ Lady Caitlin

I Need Your Help

I need your help. But a little background:

In my initial draft (and sometimes outline) I’ll use “placeholder” names which are exactly what you’d think they are. Half the time I forget them, and end up using whatever I chose to call my character (or place or thing) that first day. But ARPIP will be going through its final edits soon which means I need to be a *billion percent* sure on my names. And I’m not.

I need your help to change one.

Somehow, the really annoying, office brown-noser appeared as “Patricia,” which means I must’ve watched or read something with a similar character and she manifested herself in my world. Typical Patricia. BUT I had a lovely aunt with that name—though she went by Patty—and I’m not comfortable throwing some home-made art into the world with a negative connotation on Patricia’s. It’s just not sitting right with me, so now I call on all of you for suggestions on the PERFECT OFFICE BROWN-NOSER NAME. Maybe someone you know personally? Maybe someone you actually worked with? Well, I’m here to immortalize that poor soul forever as a Karen douche-canoe in my next novel, so I’m taking all suggestions.

What have you got? Let’s hear those names. I’ll also be posting something in my FB group—because I do that now (hair flip)—so you can comment here or there and then next week, I’ll put a poll up with the best nominees, and we’ll really settle this thing.

I’m so excited. Are you? Come on, guys. Need your help. Who did you hate, or seriously dislike, that I can forever immortalize as a Karen? Let’s find that douche-canoe and prop him or her up for the world (or my small group of readers) to see.

Let’s MF go.

~ Lady Caitlin

Starting To Feel A Little Offended

I did the stupid thing.

I waited until I was in absolute pain to make a dentist appointment. Was I aware there was a problem with my back wisdom tooth? Of course. I’ve known for a while that it was going to cause major issues down the line and I should probably get it (along with the other three) removed. So, what did I do? I went on living my life knowing it would be future-Caitlin’s problem.

And it is.

I’m her.

Present-Caitlin is now dealing with the most outrageous pain and my oral consultation has been rescheduled twice due to short staffing issues. Like, I’m dying over here. I’m popping Advils like they’re M&Ms because it’s one of the few things that keeps the pain away. So, don’t do the stupid thing and put your problems on future-you. It doesn’t work out AND it can be painful. Just my sage piece of advice for you (and your dental needs) today. (And tomorrow).

But it’ll be alright. It’s my own fault which makes the whole thing more annoying, but the really annoying thing is that the oral surgery consultation has been rescheduled twice because come on, people, let’s get this over with. Again, my own fault, but I’m already doing the adulting-thing and making the appointments to go pay the money to hear the terrible noises so someone can put tools in my mouth and take out my bad teeth. That part is taken care of by me. I just need the dentist-people to do their part and let me come visit. Honestly, I’m starting to feel a little offended.

Just look at my mouth.

Please?

That’s all I want.

For the love of everything sacred, will an oral surgeon *please* give me the A-Okay to get the surgery scheduled and the teeth pulled? That’d be fabulous. The left side of my mouth can’t carry all the chewing much longer, and I’m running out of time, so I’m really hoping this new appointment doesn’t get bumped again. I may cry if it does.

So, again, I repeat: don’t do what I did. Take care of future-you. He/She/Them/It/Whatever is really depending on you to step up today. And besides, it feels a little good to give back, doesn’t it? Even if it’s to yourself? I see you nodding.

Off to pop another Advil.

Until next week (and hopefully after my non-rescheduled appointment)…

~

Lady Caitlin

What’s Going On?

I had this whole other post for today, but I wrote it when I was annoyed.

Nah.

Probably not the best thing to share, so I’m keeping it in my “working-blog-document” which houses all the posts that just didn’t make the cut (and a bunch of political posts I’m too afraid to share). The post, which was extremely cathartic, and mostly a long vent about stupid, selfish people, is still something I had to write. Because I’m sorry, but even though the world is crazy-tough and terrifying (can we admit that now that China and Russia are teaming up?) it does not give anyone an excuse to be a completely self-absorbed butt-munch, and solely talk about themselves over and over (and over and over again) like they’re the center of the universe.

It’s exhausting.

I’m exhausted—and all I do is listen.

Anyone else feeling this? I realize I’m waving my author flag like “like at me! I write books! Please read them and support me!” but that’s different. It’s a hurdle I have to jump because I’m still suuuuper not comfortable with tooting my own horn, even though I’m not tooting it/I’m marketing myself. (Big difference, though still weird to me …) But this general sense of “look at me” that I’ve been feeling from everyone who isn’t a close personal friend or family member—what’s going on?

Is it social media? Is it the generation who grew up on it? Why are people so friggin obsessed with themselves and being right and bashing everyone who disagrees? I’m about to lose it. What happened to the we-all-can-get-along mentality, and two-sided conversations? Because ahem, one person talking only about themselves isn’t a conversation. It’s a monologue that I certainly did not sign up for.

Did they stop teaching these things in kindergarten? I think they’re right up there with the alphabet, learning to share, and keeping your hands to yourself. Give a shit about other people and—might I stress—the world does not revolve you. Sorry, but it doesn’t.

At all.

Whew…I feel better. Thanks for letting me vent. This is kind of like the other post, but not as nasty, and waaaay less emotional. Sometimes, you just need a day.

How about you? How is life? Have you noticed any of these trends? What do you do to deal with them so you don’t lose your shit? People want to know.

(Me. I want to know.)

~ Lady Caitlin

P.S. ALSO LOOK AT THE EMAIL I JUST GOT FROM RADISH:

Well this is a lovely end to the day. If you’re at all interested (and why wouldn’t you be?) you can check out Better Than This on Radish. (Or find it on Webnovel, Dreame, and iReader too?)

Better Than This Series:

An embarrassing middle-school incident keeps Alex Wolf and Autumn Sommers apart until they’re paired on a high school project in which they must pretend to be in a relationship for their Family Planning & Development class. Both just want to get through it until they begin working together, quickly discovering there might be some truth to the facade. But when Alex reveals a few secrets about his life, Autumn isn’t sure they’re able to get past them, leading to a decision that affects the next eight years, and a band fanbase of millions.

I Re-Joined Instagram

I joined Instagram. Or, I re-joined Instagram with an author account even though I already did that a few years ago, but I couldn’t access it, because you know, technology. So, when I went to “add” a new username, the one that I wanted authorcgcoppola (which makes the most sense) was already taken…by me…from a few years ago. Just can’t get to it on my phone. So, I created authorcgcoppolawrites as my NEW author Instagram, except, when I accessed it on my PC to change the profile picture, it logs me into authorcgcoppola.

*throws arms up in tantrum*

*drinks boxed wine*

Sooooooo now I have my personal account, which I rarely use, and TWO author accounts depending on which device I log into. I’m not even kidding, guys. I have no clue what I did or how to fix it, and when I tried to report a problem, it told me my “reporting a problem” button wasn’t working. So, I gave up, drank more boxed wine, and watched tiktock.

I mean…I guess two accounts is better than none? Right? Any Instagram wizards out there want to take me under their wing and help e’splain me, Lucy? Otherwise, this author is going to be the cool kid with two accounts and there’s nothing you (or I, apparently) can do about it.

How was your January? Did you get a lot accomplished? A little? Anything? Are you aware January is now over, and we’re doomed to live this day over and over again? (Thanks, Mr. Murray). Hopefully it’s doesn’t get to that because I don’t think I could repeat a Wednesday for the rest of my life without losing my mind. Plus, it would definitely slow the progress I’m making on redoing my home office.

Since we moved in, the “office” has been the junk room in the house, where all the “not sure where to put it” things end up living. It’s basically been a clutter box of randomness, with a little corner for my desk and chair to write. NO MORE. It’s nowhere near being finished but we’re getting closer:

Before, that corner held a table filled with wedding items, old cell phones and tablets, cords that went to something, mail, donation clothes (donation everything), coasters, recycled Christmas gifts, and so, so much more. It was literally a place to put the household misfits, and definitely not a space to encourage creativity. I’ve only been glaring at it for around five years but NO MORE. I’m still in the process of fully revamping the office, but we’re off to a good start. What do you think?

What about you? Any new projects? Any issues with technology and somehow (unknowingly) creating two accounts for one service because you’re that stellar with technology? No judgement here.

I’ve got some other stuff to share, but we’ll get to it next week. I have to have something for that post too, right?

Until our next date…

~ Lady Caitlin

I Was Going Cross-Eyed

SURPRISE post on Thursday! (since someone forgot to post on Wednesday…)

But doesn’t it feel nicer being closer to the weekend?

This has been a long week and extremely busy, which is why we’re chatting on Friday-eve and not hump-day. I had every intention of posting yesterday, but my half-thought-through post never made to the computer, and instead, I spent almost two hours after work uploading my entire Arizal Wars series onto a serialized platform distributor because around chapter 90 (of 294) I mis-numbered ONE chapter, and it threw the whole thing off. Lovely. And unfortunately, there was no easy auto update, so I had to go through each following chapter and manually renumber it, and that, my dear friends, nearly drove me insane, especially in hour # 2 when I was going cross-eyed. Hence, no post. Why wasn’t it written beforehand? Good question. You always have good questions.

Obviously, I’ve been busy. I’m still checking things off my never-ending to-do list, so I feel somewhat accomplished but mostly still peering off into the horizon, searching for the end of the list, but I don’t think there is one. That’s okay. Because guess who discovered boxed wine…

Like, I knew it existed. That it was a thing, and I’m sure I’ve even tried it. But (and this is where I’m confused) why didn’t anyone tell me about its most redeeming feature? The spout.

DUDE.

Duuuuuuuuuuude.  Where has this been all my life? Why hasn’t it BEEN in my life? Usually, I’d shy away from bottles because Batman doesn’t drink, and I feel silly popping open a bottle to have one, maybe two glasses of wine. And then I’d put it in the fridge, forget about it for a month, and then realize it’s likely gone bad. So, I started buying the mini 19 Crimes bottles because 1) they’re delicious and 2) they’re the perfect size, but apparently everyone caught on/inflation exists because whereas they were between $9.99-$11.99 for a four pack, they’re now 1$7.99. I’m sorry, but I haven’t inherited a dynasty, so I won’t be able to continue buying it. That’s when Batman recommended Black Box.

*MIND BLOWN*

I love it. It’s delicious and super, super convenient. I can have a glass or I can have five (though I don’t recommend that. I stop drinking when my lips turn purple…) but it’s sitting in my fridge like a Godsend, there to help my nerves, my skin and my heart. It’s probably my favorite thing I’ve discovered/tried in 2022 so far, so this year (despite there being a world of bs in the background) is looking good.

I could go on about Black Box or other writing updates, but I feel like this post is long enough and you want to get on with your Thursday activities. Noted.

Have a great weekend, try some Black Box wine, and I’ll try to remember to post correctly next week. But it’s me, so we’ll see.

~ Lady Caitlin

Hustling Status

See my newsletter? Meh? Not too shabby…I mean, for someone completely (sort of) starting out. You can say it: you liked that badass logo, that specifically selected color palette, and that link that led to a FREEBIE (because I know how to do that now). All me, baby. Oh, yeah. Amateur at its finest.

I’d like to say I winged it, but that is quite laughably far from the truth. Mailerlite (the newsletter service I’m using) offers these amazing tutorials that help technology-challenged people like me learn with idiot-proof videos. Huzzah! There IS hope for the dim-witted! I haven’t gotten through all of the tutorials yet, but it’s on my to-do list. Actually, there are about a thousand million-things on my to-do list right now, and I feel like as long as I check off one little thing each day, I’m not doing terrible. And that’s my goal at this point: don’t be terrible. I’ve been (mostly) terrible with all this for the past few years, so the goal is to change that. By doing a little everyday, I’m doing more than I did, elevating my “terrible” status to a “hustling” status, and I got to say: it feels good.

Other writing news:

I’m currently working with my cover designer, the fabulous Joleene Naylor, to bring A Royal Pairing in Perish to life visually. I can sort of see it, although some of it’s a bit blurry too, so I’ll have to figure it out here soon. I wonder if most traditionally published authors like having the burden of cover design taken off them, or if they feel they’re losing a huge creative opportunity. I’d feel like it’d be losing an opportunity, but man, a little creative direction would be nice! Of course, that’s what I’ve got Joleene for, but at the end of the day, it’s my choice. My book. My career. My business. It’s kinda important…should probably get it right…

I wish there was more to report, but that would mean more happened in my life and really, that’s not the case. Car is fine (praise the lord!), hubby’s still obsessed with Batman, and the doggos are still the best doggos in the world. Can’t complain.

What about you? What have you been up to this week? Do you have a thousand-million things on your to-do list like me? How do you handle it/get everything done and not lose your mind?

Share your secrets with me…I am royalty.

~Lady Caitlin

Newsletter Island

So…the plan—the PLAN—is to send out this year’s first newsletter on Saturday. Woot! Are you ready? I should probably be ready. I should probably work on it this week since I’ll be sending it out on 1/15 so… with that in mind, I’m keeping this post short. As in super-short. As in, barely a post at all. Since last week was the *big* announcement, we’ll call this one a bridge to next week with an awesome newsletter island in the middle.

Are you signed up? Would you like to be? In addition to my not-as-annoying pop up as before, you can sign up on my sign-up form, which should* be working. But again, it’s me, so we’ll see.

Alright guys, I’ve got nothing much for you right now. I’m on the cusp of getting my beta reader edits back, so every part of me is consumed with that—and realizing I will be even more poor (how is that possible?!) when this book is finally done because damn it takes money to make money. But at least I have my editor booked, and that sweet relief is enough.

Hope to see you in my newsletter on Saturday! Or not. Again, I’ll have no idea unless you sign up and actually open it (we have ways to know…muahahaha…) but you still might not even read it. It’s all good. (Probably just much more of me rambling anyway…) But still – yay for things happening and boo for being poor! I’m feeling all the emotions, guys.

2022 is off to a great start.

~ Lady Caitlin

*If the signup form isn’t working…please let me know. Thanks!

A Big Year

To think I almost missed this post because I put it off to do other important writerly things. Guys – it’s the first blog of the year. OF THE YEAR. Can’t miss this one.

I’ve got big plans for this year, and the plan is to stick to them. Releasing book one, writing book two, being a somebody on the indie-author scene instead of the creepy lurker I’ve grown accustomed to. All the things. I’m even breathing life into my newsletter WHICH I WILL BE CONSISTENT WITH. I have to yell at myself because no one else will and I need disciple.

TCATC is out to a handful of beta readers, and I’m only slightly nauseated in getting the feedback. I’m also throwing around the idea of how I want to title the book. The *series* is The Coyote and The Claw, but book one is A Royal Pairing in Perish. But do I want to highlight the series title, or use the individual book’s name? And how should I put them on the cover? Which one should be larger? Series title or book title? These are the CEO decisions I get to make. Just wish I would’ve paid more attention in art class.

Other big, huge, impossibly AWESOME news: my books are available in paperback! WHAT? RIGHT? YESSS. *Santa waved his magic wand/blew his fairy dust (whatever he does) and now I have physical copies of all those insane words. Proof:

Ignore the weird expression/background/adorable dogs (actually you can look at them. How could you not?)

I can literally hold my art. This is just…beyond awesome.

See? Things are changing. They’re improving. Just like my website…which will be worked on since I glanced at it yesterday and…no. BWHAHAHA no. It’s not terrible, but a bit of a revamp is needed, which has been added to my 2022 Kick Ass Writer list of things to do. But when to get to all these things? Your guess is as good as mine seeing as I have a fulltime job, a hubby who craves attention, and two dogs that think I’m only here to play fetch and give the ear-rubbies and neck-scratchies (which, let’s be honest, *probably* is my true calling). There’s so very little time in the day, and I guess I’ll have to start foregoing my sleep to get everything done. Who cares if I have huge, ugly bags under my eyes? Not me. I barely glance at myself in the mirror. Hubs has to look at me, and that fool already married me, so joke is on him.

There will always be new things to report/advertise/celebrate, but for right now, I think the paperbacks and the fact that I will be foregoing sleep to get all this done is newsworthy enough for this post—the FIRST post of 2022.

This is going to be a big year, guys. Can you feel it? You should. Feel the shift because it is COMING.

Dude—it’s already here.

Happy 2022!

~ Lady Caitlin

*Thanks for being the most awesome Santa, Mamabear

Aaaannnnddd for further proof of the awesomeness:

Too Excited To Be Scared

I’ve been keeping a giant Tupperware container in the fridge at work for over a week and I’m afraid to take it home. They’ll know it was me. That I’ve been taking up all the space (during the holiday week…) when it could’ve been used for all the other goodies. But I keep forgetting it’s there. Every day I leave, and every morning when I put my new lunch in there, I see the giant plastic bin of grossness with food and I think eww.

I think I’m just going to throw it away. It’s been in there for over a week and I really don’t want to smell it. I just don’t want to be seen throwing it away because they’ll FOR SURE know it was me and I’m still trying to make friends. Also, it’s the last of the original Tupperwares, so it’s probably time to toss the thing. Just can’t be caught when it goes down…

How was your holiday? Enjoyable? Stressful? Somewhere in the middle? Mine was great! Batman won Christmas this year because look at this:

Like, seriously. The candle alone proves he won. He could’ve gotten me this one thing and he still would’ve come out the victor. I’d never tell him this because then I’d literally only get the candle every year, and since he stopped reading this *amazing* blog years ago, he’ll never know. BWHAHAHA.

Writing News:

In my journey to actually do something with my writing, I applied for and got accepted to Radish – woot! What is Radish besides some small red vegetable? (Or is it a fruit? I don’t know…) Radish is a serialized platform that caters mostly to the romance genre, and readers pay per chapter. Kind of like sampling the book little by little instead of reading the whole thing. You can stop at any point and not continue…or you can keep going to the end. Some writers release a chapter a day, some every few days, and apparently, serialized platforms are *very* popular right now, so, I threw my name in the hat and actually got accepted. What?!  Seriously?!?

Yesssss.

I applied with my Better Than This Series, and the first chapter of the first book goes up today. Double woot! You can check it out, or check out Radish in general: here.

Other big news: beta reader copies are being distributed next week. NEXT WEEK GUYS. OMG. People—besides me and my laptop—are going to be aware of the story I’ve been writing for well over a year. I started May 2020 and here we are December 2021 with a *completely* different story, but one I love 1000 times more. I’m stoked, guys. I really am. All the nerves and terror are there (and I don’t think they’ll ever leave) but I’m pushing through. I’m too excited to be scared this time.

Next thing to work on is my newsletter because I’m realllllllly going to make it work this year. I need to. And I want to. It’s all about cultivating a fan base, right? Because if you have one of those, it helps to sell more books (which is the end game, folks.)

So, we’ve got Radish, beta readers, and a newsletter I will be Frankenstein-ing back to life. All the things, people. I’m doing all the things.

Well, this is our last chat in 2021. I hope you stick around for all the excitement in 2022, and I hope you have a fabulous time bringing in the new year!

~ Lady Caitlin

P.S. I finally threw the Tupperware out. There was no other way