#TwitterPitch

There’s this thing called TwitterPitch that I think I’m going to do. Heard of it? You probably haven’t as I just heard of it and I’ve been in the writing game for a few years. Although, I’m slightly retarded when it comes to being up to date on things so maybe you have. But if not, it’s this great tool for authors to submit their MS via twitter with an (obviously short) pitch. I don’t really use twitter. I’m still unsure about the whole thing and why I should be on there and why I should care (I’m being totally honest here. I just don’t think it’s my thing.) BUT I like that this is a new platform for reaching out to agents and publishers and people, so I’m going to give it a go. At least, for the TwitterPitch.

Ready?

Let’s pretend you are this *amazing* agent who’s like, ‘yeah, I represent baddass authors. All my bitches be at the top of the Best Sellers list (I don’t know why you talk like this. You should probably sound more professional.) So, you’re having a look through the Twittersphere to find your next favorite project. Then you come across the following:

After what happened three years ago, Autumn Sommers knows to avoid Alex Wolf. Now that a school assignment has brought them together, she’ll be forced to move beyond their past with the one person who can’t seem to forget it. But neither expects what happens next. #YA#R#IWSGPIT

Eh? Eh?

What do you think? Would that make you want to ask for more? A first chapter perhaps? If you’re wondering about the #YA#R#IWSGPIT, it’s the age, genre, and group I’m submitting through. Young Adult in the Romance category through the IWSG. The deal is, you ‘pitch’ your book through Twitter and if an agent or publisher is interested, they’ll request (along with a query and/or synopsis) a chapter or a partial or full MS. How cool is that? Sometimes living in this age rocks.  😊

I’m working on my query and synopsis in case anyone bites. I’m still totally planning on self-publishing because at least I know it’ll get out into the world, but why not try traditional as well? What could it hurt? It’s another shot and that’s what I need to be doing—taking as many shots as possible (basketball metaphor. Not alcohol. Although…)

Batman is so encouraging of me. He shows me videos all the time of people—famous, amazing people—who started off being told no. Or being turned down. Or thinking they weren’t good enough. There are so many I love and think about often, but for today’s post, I’ll reference the Will Ferrell one. Batman showed me a clip of Will Ferrell talking about his early days, before getting on SNL, before becoming the name he is and that his plan—his entire plan—was to keep throwing darts at the board because he knew ONE of them would eventually stick. So that’s what I’m doing. Throwing darts. Taking shots (basketball, people!) because I know ONE of them will work. It has to, right?

I’d love your feedback on the pitch. And for any authors interested, it’s happening on January 18th. Check out the info page at IWSG here. 😊

Surprise Sunday Post

The fun thing about fucking with people is fucking with people. So, it’s kind of all encompassing. Take me, for example. At the New Year’s Eve Party that Batman and I attended, we planted this terribly ugly Christmas decoration that was given to my mom and then passed along to us. I’d like to think that we’re second in the long line of people to “push it forward.” Kind of like “pay it forward” but with less good intentions and more laughs. The object in question is a DIY project kind of gone wrong… it’s an upside- down wine glass with a tiny Christmas tree and fake snow. It’s amazing fugly and I’m so excited to release it back into the wild. I left it in the bathroom along with all the nice, normal decorations.

Perfectly planted right behind the Santa.

I can’t wait to hear about how weird it was that this “random” thing showed up and what they’re going to do with it. Seriously. Can’t wait. This is super non-writing related, but it made me laugh and I wanted to share my excitement.

UPDATE: Batman returned to the scene of the crime and just sent me this:

Still there and no idea it was us. 🙂

Don’t Stop Believing

I actually had something really cool happen recently 😊

So, the series I’m known for *cough the only one I’ve written cough* (and displayed here on the right panel for your viewing pleasure) is my Sci-fi Romance thing that I haven’t touched in—eh—maybe a year. The fourth book was published in 2016 and I still haven’t written a word of the fifth and final one (sorry Batman, Jolene, and now Shelby). I’m telling you all of this because I’ve been so wrapped up with BTT that I kind of forget about pushing the series, so when a mutual friend discovered that yours truly pens fiction, she bought them—and has been texting about them non stop 😉

I know that sounds like, who cares, right? GUYS. When someone is consistently gushing over something YOU did, asking questions, making predictions and overall pulsing with excitement, it’s great. It’s like, validating. Like, maybe I don’t totally suck at this writing thing. Maybe. (Probably still do, but it’s nice to have someone disagree.)

Second cool thing? That sad, sad little 0 units sold record I had going was SHATTERED with 4 sold units. Yeah. Four! All to the same person, but still. Someone is PAYING to read my stuff. IS there anything cooler than that? (The answer is no, by the way. No, nothing is cooler.)

*HAPPY DANCE ENSUES*

Seriously. I’ve been so caught up in loving/hating BTT and wondering at what point do I stop torturing myself with the same few paragraphs and finally shove it into someone else’s hands that I’ve completely put my main project, Arizal Wars, on the back-burner (for like, a long time now. Probably too long).

I started writing it in 2011 and needed a break around 2015, when I wrote Rozmarie & Josiah. I had one (semi) fan ask about the fourth book and I got right back to it. After that, it’s been all BTT, developing this series since I couldn’t stop writing it, but I need to get back to my first one—my baby—and finish the fifth and final book.

If someone could just give me endless time or the winning lottery ticket, I promise only to use it on provisions so I can keep surviving long enough to do all the creative projects I want. Okay? Please? Genies and fairy godmothers are also welcome. Nothing shady, people.

This Post is About Burps. And Food.

Today I listened to a coworker belch for over an hour.

This is my life.

I don’t just mean he burped, pardoned himself, and I went on living my life in relative peace. No. No that’s not at all what happened. There was a mighty drum of epic grossness and it bellowed—literally bellowed—like a stomach troll hitting a gong. Loud and wet and sloppy. Over and over and over again. And by the seventh—eighth? Ninth?—mega-belch, I was done. Totally—and justifiably, I think—grossed out. I’m not sure why the belch-fest had to occur the ENTIRE HOUR BEFORE MY LUNCH, but it did, which meant I was only able to pick at my pre-made salad instead of diving into it like I should’ve while gorging over Harry and Megan engagement details. All because someone made the wrong decision on a late breakfast.

But other than that, all food things have been okay. In fact, I ate a lot of it last week for Thanksgiving 🙂 Free food and time with family (and booze)—how could anyone not enjoy themselves? I made a tomato-feta salad and a “noodle pudding” which is actually a Jewish dish but I’m drawing a blank on the name. They go over well whenever I make them (and Batman and I gobble up the leftovers) so it’s a win-win.

What about you? How was your Thanksgiving? What did you make? And have you ever wanted to strangle your coworkers? #youarenotalone

Halloween & IWSG

Happy Halloween!

I only say that because it’s currently Halloween and I’m still in the ghoulish spirit. I know you’re reading this tomorrow, November 1st, but you should hop in your DeLorean and come back a day because I have to mention Halloween for a second:

Clearly, I’m shit faced—but Yes! We were Sharon & Randy Marsh! You know, from South Park 😊. We didn’t go the extra mile and make the cartoon faces but I blame that on the fact that I was putting together an ENTIRE PIRATE HALLOWEEN PARTY and had to throw creative amazingness all over, so it’s okay that I skimmed on our costumes a little. But look at those awesome testicles! Still super proud of my handy-work, and I should be, because every lady went in for a feel at least once 😉 (if you’ve never seen the episode, Randy gives himself testicular cancer to get medicinal marijuana. The joke is that they were so large he was able to bounce them down the road.)

I was really planning on taking a ton of pictures during the ho-down but the extrovert in me was busy chatting it up so I didn’t. I snapped a few the next morning before I cleaned up:

I hope you had a good Halloween and that you got the good candy you like. I hope the kids don’t take all our candy and that Appa doesn’t lose his shit every time the doorbell rings (but that’s wishful thinking.)

Okay! Onto writing stuff 😊

October was another great month of writing the second part of my trilogy and I’m still jamming to the New-Found-Glory soundtrack that’s been inspiring me during this entire creative endeavor. At some point I know I have to Cowboy the Fuck up and get a few BETAs to read BTT. I’m REALLY excited about writing the rest of the story… but I guess I am very nervous about the first being read too, which is why I keep putting it off. Like, I know I’m going to go through it at least once more and make some changes (thanks to discovering things from book 2!) so it’s a good thing that I haven’t let anyone read it yet. But even when I feel *really* good about it, I still think I’ll be nervous. I know that’s normal… but I don’t want to let my fear keep the story—or me—from growing.

Enough of that and onto the optional November Question:

Win or not, do you usually finish your NANO project? Have any of them gone on to be published?

I… have never done NANO. Like, ever. It doesn’t appeal to me one bit, and I think it’s because I associate it with stress and don’t need stress ANYWHERE near my writing. I get why people do it. The challenge and holding yourself accountable and all that but I do that anyway. Like, every day. I don’t know… it feels like I would be doing the same thing but being harder on myself about it.

After a few years of consistent writing, I have my own schedule that allows me to get immense amounts of work done while not feeling guilty if I’ve missed a day or two. I think everyone has a system that works for them and if some people thrive on the time-challenge—that’s great. I’m just not one of those people.

Insecure Writer’s Support Group (IWSG) is a monthly blog hop for writers at all levels to share their fears and insecurities in a safe and encouraging place. Please drop by and say hi to Alex Cavanaugh who started this nifty concept in bringing us all together.

 

How Was My Weekend?

We went to Chicago!

And made it back safely which is AMAZING because the ride home was shaky and terrible and I found myself wondering what kind of eulogies people would give me. But we landed in one piece and I’m home and writing this while it’s all still fresh (and because I’m kicking ass at this October Resolutions thing). But to answer your burning question: YES! My weekend was awesome. Thanks for asking 😉

Let’s start with our flight out:

Oh yeah. Rows apart and still stoked. Little bummed Batman and I couldn’t sit together, but I had a nice view out the window. Kind of made up for the 3:00 alarm to make it to the airport on time:

I totally forgot to take pictures of the hotel, which I probably should’ve done. It was gorgeous. Really gorgeous. Like, no offense La Quinta, but this hotel has long hallways with nice carpet where two creepy girls wouldn’t look out of place at the end of one. Just saying.

I did, however, remember to take a picture or two of our Architecture Boat Tour. It was good, and would’ve been a lot more educational if I’d been able to hear the guide, a fine older gentleman who didn’t understand the correlation between his mouth and the device used to amplify it. But it was still nice. Batman and I enjoyed the view and the not-having-to-walk-part since we speed-walked fifteen minutes to get there. So, the hour and a half cruise was a great cool down to the fifteen minutes of actual exercise I’ve done recently.

After the boat ride, there was some more recouping at the hotel, followed by the rehearsal at an AWESOME Mexican restaurant with delicious margaritas. This is where I would post those pictures but it was open bar and I already mentioned the margaritas.

Saturday, we played tourist and went to Millennium Park. Look, the Bean! (This is the part where I’m just going to post some random pictures that I took. Here we go:

Lots of fun. 😊

After a quick trip to a retro video game store to scratch Batman’s collector’s itch, we headed back to the hotel to prepare for the big event. Then there were lots of drinks and yummy appetizers and toasts and not knowing where my phone was. Again, the open bar was-a-calling, and I’m pretty much a dance whore at weddings, so there wasn’t a lot of picture-taking at the reception either. But we had a blast and I only fell once, which in my book is a win.

We left on Sunday, but not before seeing the Navy Pier!

So, it was kind of chilly and *shockingly* very, very windy. I didn’t go on the Ferris Wheel because, let’s face it, I was out of money by that point and I have a thing with heights and not wanting to fall from them. Batman and I took a walk around the Navy Pier and I think I got some decent shots. What do you think?

After that, it was saying goodbye to family and heading back to the airport for our flight home. Delayed an hour due to maintenance, and then another half  of sitting on the runway, we were *finally* off the ground and FL bound! We got back at midnight on Monday only to find someone stole Batman’s totally awesome Yoda tag (that I bought for him) so that was a bit of a bummer.

But other than that, Chicago was a blast. 🙂

How was your weekend?