Show Me the Exploding Heads

So.

Stuff’s getting a little crazy out there, huh? I will say I was shocked—SHOCKED—over the whole toilet-paper thing. And not just because of the *immense* amount of insanity concerning people’s usage of it, but because I’d been meaning to stock up for a while, about three weeks before the panic started. I like to have a lot in inventory (for just this reason) and I kept telling Batman we needed to pick up another pack or two, and he’d say we have enough, and I’d agree, but then mention it the following week and the same thing would happen. And wouldn’t you know it—toilet paper is like fucking currency now. Damnit Batman!

I don’t understand what’s happening in the world.

I feel like I’m watching a movie, but also participating in the outtakes, like when I go to the store and find this:

9928

We’ve all seen and shared similar photos and videos because OMG WHAT IS HAPPENING? We are we going crazy and

1) abandoning all common sense

2) being assholes to each other

I totally realize there is a virus out there and it is not a great one (are there any great ones?) but it’s…normal-ish, right? Nobody’s heads are blowing up. People aren’t sprouting balls on their shoulders, or mutating or boiling alive—right?? (Please tell me if the symptoms have updated) Like, if I see someone’s head explode after a sneeze, or if their elbows fall off in a gooey acidy-manner, then hell yes get the hell away from me and everyone stay indoors for the summer. Holy Shit. But no one’s heads are exploding. And, I even get the not wanting to spread it (I really, really do) but what I don’t get is the unnecessary panic. The hysteria over something that hasn’t wiped out a *major* portion of the worldwide population. AND AGAIN—NO HEADS EXPLODING.

I blame the media. I really do. It’s creating unnecessary panic which is making it very difficult for the majority of the country. Everyone is going to hurt from this. Everyone. And for a while. But seriously—why? Why are we going to this extreme to cause this much distress on our country and countrymen.

SHOW ME THE EXPLODING HEADS.

I don’t know. Maybe I’m just upset we’re down to three rolls of toilet paper and we could’ve been living like kings. Oh well. Guess I’ll know for the next time this anomaly comes along.

I hope you all are doing well & being safe. I’d remind you to wash your hands but

1) you shouldn’t need reminding

2) you’ve been reminded enough

We’ll see what the world looks like this time next week.

Remember to stay calm and STAY CALM

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