Not Giving Up Yet, IWSG

This is super last minute but I didn’t want to get kicked out of the IWSG club. I should’ve written this post on Sunday but I was at a losing football match and then in a game store for way too long waiting on Batman to add to his NES collection so by the time I got home and played with Appa, I only wanted to sit down and wait for WestWorld to come on. Which is what I did. (PLEASE watch Westworld. Let’s talk about it. I need more people to talk about it with.)

And here we are. Tuesday night.

As far as writing goes…I’m fine. I guess. I almost didn’t write this post because I don’t want to jinx the not having depressive thoughts over writing/being a writer/living a writer lifestyle. It’s pretty much a daily battle, but if I at least get a little writing done (even if marketing / reading / networking / EVERYTHING ELSE goes out the window) I consider it a win. And I have been writing each day—same thing that’s been in my head since the beginning of this year.

Sometimes I look at my WIP and think “psshh—you’re NEVER showing this to a living soul.”


So, I’m not really sure how I feel about it. But each day there’s progress and I’ll take that over falling into the pit of depression and self-loathing and wishing I was something straightforward like a teacher or nurse or whatever real adults do for a living.

The IWSG question this month:

In terms of your writing career, where do you see yourself five years from now, and what’s your plan to get there?

Oh, geez, I don’t know. I’d planned on being a bestselling author by now, but maybe 36 is more my year. I have absolutely NO IDEA where I’m going to be in five years, but I hope I’m still writing.

No. I KNOW I’ll still be writing.

Will I be making any money from it? I sure hope so. I also hope I won’t kill myself between now and then working away at a string of dead-end jobs waiting for my Colleen Hoover moment.

Insecure Writer’s Support Group (IWSG) is a monthly blog hop for writers at all levels to share their fears and insecurities in a safe and encouraging place. Please drop by and say hi to Alex Cavanaugh who started this nifty concept in bringing us all together.

P.S. I’m only kidding about killing myself. It’d just be a serious maiming.

P.P.S. I’m kidding about the maiming. NOT kidding about the depression or occasional suicidal thought. But we all get those. I’m pretty sure Bill Burr covered it in one of his skits. God I love Bill Burr.

19 thoughts on “Not Giving Up Yet, IWSG

  1. C.D. Gallant-King says:

    You’ll still be writing. And you’ll still be improving and going through a roller coaster of emotions. Unless you’re just in it for the money (which, by the way, is a terrible idea), writers will always write, even if it’s just little journals and stories for yourself.

    The important thing is that we keep moving forward. Try something new, get better, get a few more reviews or sales; whatever you need to do to keep it exciting. Who knows? Maybe someday you WILL rule the bestsellers list. 😉

  2. Loni Townsend says:

    I get the highs and lows too. But hey! You’ve got progress every day, even if it’s just a little bit, so that’s good. Progress will get you there someday.

    I don’t have HBO at the moment, but I’ll see if my husband wants to check out Westworld sometime.

  3. tess611 says:

    I relate a lot to what you said, minus the writing every day part, because I’m not even doing that! But I do feel like writing is a compulsion, for better or worse. I’ve been writing, and wanting to be a writer my whole life, even when I realized that I might never get anywhere with it. It’s just a lot harder than it seems.

  4. cgcoppola says:

    It’s way harder than people think. Only writers will get that. But, even if you don’t ‘make it,’ having written something is still incredible. Maybe it’s worth it just for that.

    And please don’t give up. It’s awfully tempting but you’re stronger than that. If you weren’t, you wouldn’t be here.

  5. Lynn La Vita says:

    You have the right attitude and drive to get out of that cubicle. You can’t give up, you have ink in your veins and writing gives you a zest for life. Remember, the best is yet to come!

  6. cecelia earl says:

    Ha, I threw my post together super fast, not last night, but THIS MORNING. 🙂 I never set an age goal for being a successful writer, I set a book goal…my SIXTH book will be my successful novel. 🙂 And maybe it will. It needs revision and then a chance. Christy from @ericachristy Thanks for visiting our blog!

  7. Rebecca Douglass says:

    Any day you write is a victory! And any day you feel good about it, it to be treasured.

    Every writer, as far as I can tell (maybe with a few exceptions?) has days in the process when they are convinced that their work is a steaming dung-pile. If you don’t, you are probably doing something wrong. So keep writing, and embrace the bad days as proof you are a writer!

    My IWSG Post

  8. Debbie Johansson says:

    Oh yes, I’ve had days like that. I’ve tried giving up writing a few times, but it never lasts long. I always come back to it, so I guess I’m in this for the long haul. Sounds like you are too! Good on you for writing every day and making progress with your WIP – I look forward to hearing when you’ve finished. Remember, progress is progress no matter how small. 🙂

  9. Angela Wooldridge says:

    Oh yes… ‘this is terrible! – No! this is brilliant!’ ‘you’re a genius! or maybe you’re an idiot?’ aarrgh!!
    Isn’t that roller coaster ride of doubt and emotion just SO much fun?
    Looking forward to seeing you on the bestseller lists in a few years 🙂
    Westworld – I’m assuming it’s not the Yul Brenner film, or the song by an 80’s punk band that you’re talking about. I’ll check it out…

  10. ahtdoucette says:

    CG, I was LOL at several points in your post. You totally nailed me with the whole waffling between “this book sucks” and “it’s the best book ever!” That’s one of those funny things I’ve never admitted to anyone, not even – I think – to myself. I do that, though! Why is that?
    I don’t have HBO, sorry. I’m poor and cheap so I usually wait for things to come out on Amazon video or at the library. I just looked it up though, and sounds really interesting. I love sci-fi westerns.

  11. Mason T. Matchak says:

    I’m with you on all of this. (Except Westworld, never seen it and I only watch one show anyway.) It’s like every single aspect of this writing thing is its own individual rollercoaster, and no two parts of it are ever up at the same time. Gah. >_<

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