Cinderella, Bitches.

And who’s registered for the Writer’s Digest Annual Conference this summer?


Watch out fugly stepsisters – the pumpkin carriage has arrived.

I did it. Registered. Picked my workshops and even signed up for Pitch Slam, which will most likely give me a panic attack day of, but for right now, excitement’s the main emotion, not dread. I’m weird (I think the word is technically awkward) with public speaking or promoting myself or doing anything other than being silly and telling jokes. But with Pitch Slam, you can actually pitch your idea to like, a real agent/editor. Who’ll listen! And think about your work! And actually give you feed back! Which seems pretty important when you’re craving cubicle escapism to sit (or stand) all day at your home keyboard.

I just hope I don’t throw up on them.

To be honest, I’m nervous. Scared. Terrified even that 1.) I’ll get on the wrong plane which will take me to Thailand or Croatia or some far off place and I’ll be forever lost in the world or 2.) I’ll actually make it to NY but the taxi will drive through the ghetto and I’ll be like “this doesn’t look like the Roosevelt” seconds before I’m looking down from a white cloud and shaking my (angelic?) head in disappointment because I really wanted to go to this conference. But basically it’s that  3.) I’m doing this by myself. Most likely. Batman may come but if he doesn’t, it’s on me, which means navigating the hotel and workshops (seriously, I’m DUMB with direction) and doing the Pitch Slam without support. You know, like, right then and there support. The hugging and the quick drink (chugging) to suppress rising nerves. I’ll be fine. I know I will. And I’m excited. Super excited, but I just don’t want to freeze. And I’m a freezer. I’m a turn tomato-red, heart-exploding, body-freezing pansy that nearly had to run off stage during my soliloquy in Drama Class. Yeah right that prepared me for the real world. More like secured my distaste for the spotlight. But it’s okay, because everyone has fear sometimes right? And it’s your choice to:

Forget Everything And Run.


Face Everything And Rise.

I love this. I saw it on Pintrest recently and was like omg, totally my new mantra. Besides, “Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” – someone important. (I love quotes about fear. It’s like saying it over and over will make it easier to face, like using ‘Voldemort’ instead ‘he who shall not be named’ because you’re finished giving him power. And you’re not scared of his creepy, snaky face anymore.)

So I’m going to step outside of my freaky-breakdown-reaction mode and rock it. I’m going to rock this conference and the Pitch Slam, even if nothing comes out of it other than a lot of useful information and a serious minibar charge.

So watch out, NY.

Cinderella’s going to the ball, bitches.