How about I walked into the bedroom and had a whole conversation with a bunch of pillows disguised as a body. Extremely eager to share what Samantha did on Sex and the City, I was confused why Batman wasn’t instantly responding, but the three glasses of wine kept me talking. So angered over the fact that Samantha would cheat on Smith with Richard (who’s an asshole!), I didn’t understand why Batman wouldn’t comment. He wouldn’t even move. Slowly, I pulled back the purple comforter and found a mash of our pillows together and gasped aloud.

He was in the closet laughing.